


EMBARRASSMENT - JIHAN

by moodyminghao



Category: K-pop, SEVENTEEN (Band)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:01:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26246842
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moodyminghao/pseuds/moodyminghao
Summary: Joshua has had enough of Jeonghan’s manipulation and constant bad-mouthing. He’s trying to leave, but someone is making it harder than it needs to be.
Relationships: Hong Jisoo | Joshua & Yoon Jeonghan, Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Yoon Jeonghan
Comments: 2
Kudos: 22





	EMBARRASSMENT - JIHAN

There Joshua was, in the same position he had been in many times. He swore to himself every time it happened that it would be the last, yet, it never seemed to be. Behind him stood Jeonghan. The elder was clutching onto Joshua’s shirt tightly, tears in his eyes and a voice so fragile it sounded like the human embodiment of breaking glass as he said: “Please, don’t go.” Joshua felt bad, of course he did. But he couldn’t take it. All the times he had let himself be manipulated and lied to were catching up to him, and it was starting to break him, shatter him. “Let go, jeonghan. I don’t want to have to hurt you, so please, cooperate.” “no, please! you can’t go. I need you.” “Really? Because what you told your friends made it seem like quite the opposite.”

As if joshua had electrocuted him, jeonghan flinched and let the younger go.

“You- I- it’s- I didn’t mean it that way.”

“Really? then what did you mean?” The words that jeonghan had said were catching up to him, hitting him like bricks. It was painful, having to admit the truth. Again. _‘it’s embarrassing, really. To date a foreigner. He gets so much unnecessary attention from others that I always dread when people ask him where he’s from.”_

“What’s so embarrassing about it, han? why is it so dreadful for you? I really would like to know.” Joshua spat, more angry than sad by this point. He knew that just like every time these things happened, he wasn’t going to get any answers.

Whenever Jeonghan did this, he always managed to pull some tears, make up excuses and get joshua to stay. It worked, because joshua usually didn’t hear the entire statement and didn’t want to assume things. But this time, he had heard everything. An entire conversation about him, and how much of an embarrassment he was.

It was always something different. According to jeonghan, he was a mean person, had a bad temper, a player, short-witted, slow-minded, and now an embarrassment. None of those things were true, he knew it well. He was a self aware person. The amount of times he had “changed” thanks to jeonghan were uncountable. Why the elder lied about him all the time? that was a question that will remain unanswered. After waiting, and not getting any answers or even a statement from his lover, joshua knew it was over. “I’m done jeonghan. I’ve done nothing but give you love, care for you, treat you like a prince, give you all i have in me, all for you to spread lies about me and play me to be the bad guy just because you can’t admit to yourself that it isn’t me who’s wrong in this relationship.” “Shua,please-“ Jeonghan said, trying to grab the younger’s arm again. “No.” Was all joshua said before snatching his arm back and leaving. Slamming the door behind him.

Jeonghan fell to his knees and sobbed. He didn’t realize how much he was losing until it was already gone, until he had already messed up.

When Joshua walked outside, far from the house, he took a deep breath and looked up at the sky. He felt free. Free from the manipulation and lies. Free from the guilt and regret that he felt whenever the other had managed to fool him into thinking these things were his fault. In a perfect world, Joshua would bask in the freedom, carefree and painless. But he was weak and this world sucks. Even if jeonghan was manipulative and downright toxic, Joshua still loved him. You can’t just throw away a four year relationship that easily and expect the outcome to be painless. Of course it’s going to hurt. But at least now, he won’t have to worry about dealing with another person that does nothing but chip away at his mental stability. It would take him a while to get rid of all the pain and sorrow. It would also take a while for him to get the image of jeonghan sobbing and begging him not to leave out of his head. But in the end, it would be worth it. Because all good things take time, and time is all he had.


End file.
